re reboot fic and the mpreg thing, bless you dudes:

Meg: if they have a baby it's going to be carefully designed in a lab and carried by a surrogate and then Spock is going to be teh scariest mommy ever
Meg: .... maybe I could lie and say that one or both of them get hormone injections so they can nurse. No, it would have to be Spock, because Kirk is probably allergic.

Then it kind of segued into Kirk being the sort of hysterical parent that remembers what they pulled at that age. Seriously, why do people let me talk to people on the internet?

Meg: see, my primary thoughts re Star Trek today have been "Could Jim force Bones and Spock to dress up and go clubbing, and if so, could he also bully Spock into glittery eyeshadow? Can I make this totally platonic?"

Also I am reading a fic where Pike is called 'elderly'.

Now I realize I spend most of my time hanging around dudes who are rocking their ninety-somethinghood and all, but PIKE IS NOT ELDERLY. HELLO, THERE ARE PEOPLE IN THE STAR TREK WORLD WHO LIVE TO BE 140, HE IS BARELY MATURE. Ficcing fandom has been annoying me a little lately. Mostly because people seem to dig the abuse thing a little too much for my taste.

Which on one hand, you know, if you like it and I don't, w/e, different strokes and if we all liked the same thing there wouldn't be enough to go around and all, but on the other hand. OH GOD IT'S BAD ENOUGH THAT YOU'RE MAKING KIRK A WEEPY UKE HEALED BY SPOCK'S COCK BUT COULD YOU PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND LITTLE GREEN FISHES, PLEASE LEAVE SPOCK THE HELL ALONE. I'm not even going to talk about the Clthulu cock Spock has in one fic. Or the .... self-lubing .... you know what, I think I'm going to pack this up and go to Knit Night before I actually break something laughing.

( In conclusion )

title: We Used to Talk
pairing: kirk/spock
rating: G
disclaimer: yeah, no.
summary: it's like the twins in the spaceship.
notes: god i hate writing vulcans Q_Q x-posted to hell and back, sry


( even atlantis sank into the ocean's floor )


This is actually the shorter of the two fics I was working on this weekend orz I mean, seriously, you dudes, have you ever thought about how to express the complex inner emotional life of someone who has two settings, "ice cube" and "HOLY SHIT IT'S A VOLCANO GET IN THE CAR GET IN THE CAR"?

The other one is ... longer. Also kicking my ass. I realize and accept that of the two types of ficcers, the ones who carefully figure out motivation and what aspect of the characters they want to explore and research when so and so did thus and thus, and the type that say to themselves, THESE DUDES SHOULD MAKE OUT, I am always going to be on the side of THESE DUDES SHOULD MAKE OUT. But still, I like to have things tidy, yeah? And it's not interesting to read if they don't sound like the characters that you wanted to have make out in the first place.

It's been fun times! For an encore I think I will write a pon farr fic entirely from T'Pring's POV and have a threesome with her and Kirk and Spock (<-- this is probably a joke), but before them I am going to don a hazmat mask and toss the eggs, and then I will walk to the store and get some more.

IF I EVER THINK THAT WRITING WAFFY FIC FROM SPOCK'S POINT OF VIEW IS A GREAT IDEA EVER AGAIN, PLEASE JUST KILL ME ON SIGHT.

IT WAS REALLY FUCKING HARD OKAY

AND I'M STILL EDITING THE FUCKER

CHRIST

HONESTLY I MUST HAVE BEEN IN THE MIDDLE OF HEAT STROKE OR SOMETHING

could anybody provide a sister with the exact locations of the fingers for the Vulcan mindmeld?

I AM BY GOD GOING TO MAKE SPOCK REACHING OUT TO TOUCH JIM FOR ONE HOTTER THAN FIVE PAGES OF PORN IF IT IS THE LAST THING I DO ON THIS EARTH

cough

MEG: Dude, someone will be with you in a second!
KW RESIDENT: One one thousand.
MEG: .... you got me there, buddy.


I think I'm going to pack up Kagami and ooze out to the library and try to get some actual writing done before knit night. I need to get a new MP3 player because I can't find Ohno-kun anywhere, again. (Never mind, he was hiding in the knitting needles, doubtless because they reminded him of Nino and/or Jun. HAS anybody written a fic joking about Jun's reaction when Michael Jackson died? because that had to be hilarious shit.) I'm thinking a super-cheap one again, I am not picky as long as I have music.

Also I pictured Spock and Tendou Souji in the same room and almost killed myself lolling, Jim Kirk would never know what hit him. (tammaiya: both their fists, probably.) Kagami would just take one look and decide there was being manly and then there was stark terror and he'd rather err on the side of living another day. ...also I am thirty years old and I understand coming up with horrible crossovers should eventually grow old, but apparently I am sitll immature like that. Shit, dudes, Sora and Spock in the same room, how would that NOT end in tears.

People at work are asking me if I have an SO and I am seriously considering just putting up a sign that says I AM NOT THAT INTERESTED IN LADIES OR DUDES, THANKS FOR ASKING. Honestly, I get that asexuality is not a hetronormative choice but must it turn into a huge I'M QUEER YOU GUYS STOP ASKING ABOUT IT thing? Although I think the dude at Starbucks gave me a discount for my I'M NOT GAY I JUST REALLY LIKE RAINBOWS wallet. >_>a

I'm making a felted bag out of Malabrigo Bulky (my evil enablers over at Knit/Purl helpfully had a sale on their Malabrigo) - it's double-knit, which is a stupidly, stupidly fascinating technique that zips along like anything. The color is nice too - it's Continental blue - and I think it's going to turn out nice when it's done. The only thing that I'm dubious over is if the inside is going to stick together when it actually goes to be felted. I might have to wad some plastic inside and hope for the best.

My lordy, look at that, it must be my evil twin who did it. Wait, she has publicly stated she does not grok fanfic. My evil triplet Lola again?

James Blish's novelizations of TOS continue to be hilarifying and awesome. Also apparently NBC was willing to have Spock and Kirk flogged side by side but apparently it was too gay to show the first time Spock called Jim by his first name and offer to take him to Vulcan to heel a broken hart? I was like, Well then!

Anyway, I actually was the third person who signed up, which terrifies me, and what terrifies me even more is that I have an idea and everything.

1. Yesterday I went to the Aveda Institute and got my hair fixed up -- which for ten dollars is a decent hair cut and then the girl rubbed my hands, shoulders and scalp, plus lipstick, because they're just that crazy. Also the instructor fixed up what mistakes she made.
1a. Unfortunately she did my hair up in a really really curly side part when she finished.
1b. I had that style in 1991.
1c. JESUS CHRIST ITS MOLLY RINGWALD GET IN THE CAR GET IN THE CAR
1d. Also there is nothing that drives me crazier faster than hair over my eyes, no matter how cute it is alleged to be.
1e. So if you are in Portland, I recommend them! it ranges from 10 if you get a n00b and 15 if you get a senior, and they are very nice.

2. Dudes, ladies, my friends, where in the hell is the Star Trek Fic Daily comm or whatever because I can't find it and there has got to be a nice, friendly, insane person posting links to all the porno and vids with Kirk and Spock eyefucking across the bridge.
2a. I don't want to spend eight twenty five to watch the movie again but when it gets to the cheap theatres OH HELL YES
2b. Why is there so much Kirk/Bones fic, I love them both but they are not fucking. Bones is too horribly aware of where That Thing Has Been and also, Jim likes having someone who he doesn't have to posture all manly at.
3b. I may have requested the novelization from Powells, because they were fucking out at Burnside.

4. While I was there, I picked up a couple of the Old Skool novels and you know what? some of the Trek writers were unexpectedly badass, and also Kirk really always was that much of a slutty blond.
4a. Bless his little heart, anyway.

Other than that ... I caregave. I did like four huge loads of laundry because we haven't done any for longer than I care to think about and we were running out of underwear, not to mention work clothes. Apparently you can get Star Trek: Enterprise DVDs from the library but I am resisting womanfully.

I'll be over here, desperately pretending I did not take one look at Pike and totally understand why people were writing the pornos. Oh God.

Also, Bones? df;sadkla I LOVE HIM HE AND JIM NEED TO BE NERDY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER. Someone on the kink meme was writing one where they had the whole JE idea of personal space and it was cute and all but now I totally want one where they never make it romantic. It's just. Bones does not want any of Jim's horrible space cooties and Jim likes having someone who he does not have to posture for, so he hangs all over him and Bones lets him and it is like, revoltingly awesome.

BRB RUSHING OFF TO MAKE EVEN MORE JOKES ABOUT BONES AND HIS HYPOSPRAY FETISH.

PS: I will ... I don't know what I'll do but I would probably love you a lot if you made or found me a link to a vid made with this song: http://www.megaupload.com/?d=TNW36BAG

Which song is actually one of the gayest ones i have ever heard, and I include NEWS warbling determinedly that they are barefoot Cinderella boys in that number. THERE NEEDS TO BE A VID, OKAY.

( I should, logically, either watch the damn movie or start burning through TOS on Youtube or buy it or something - Spock drops the L-Bomb, a scrap thereof )

Amy: you home?
Meg: y
Meg:where are you
Amy:naked in the living room, maybe I should hit the tub
Meg: right, I thought I heard someone in the house
Meg:dude let me pee first

I really want to join the party and write Kirk/Spock from ST Reboot but I haven't seen the movie (either too broke, too tired, or the thought of going to a mall made me go under the bed and glare out, making ominous hissy noises like a tea kettle) and, well. I did force Becky to start playing Pokeymans! I am variously avenged!

In my defense, at least I could be relied on not to try to make Kirk and Spock Prime make whoopie. I mean, I'm as fond as Leonard Nimoy as anybody else, but ... ick? Also ... gross? Sorry dudes there is an age limit on people I am willing to imagine banging. It's bad enough we actually have a Jim in the Memory Care unit. (Basically, if I have been responsible for putting someone in their age group into jammies and tucking them into bed, my reaction is AUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUGH.)

I want to write a series of fics called "Studies in Dropping the L-Bomb", where the entire point is someone tells someone else they love them and the other point is how to do it right. This is somewhat related to my desire to read K/S fic, and my hysterical conviction that if I take one step off the beaten path of my f-list, the first thing I will find is weepy uke Spock sobbing he's never felt this way before, Jim darling.

Don't lie. I know it's waiting for me. It's just waiting for the right moment to strike. I can sense it.

The point here being, it's hard to drop the L-bomb in any fic without coming across as a hack. This is possibly a thing to do with writing slash/yaoi, where you're trying to suggest manly, manly restraint, and partly just a thing about writing. I like it better when by the time someone drops the L-bomb into a conversation, it's kind of an obvious conclusion. It's hard to do, though - you have to build it up, and it's easier to have the words make up for the details. I mean, dudes on a bed gasping I love you - I love you!! are all very well and good, but there's not the payoff that really showing the audience that Party A is not just saying it to get Party B into the bed in the first place. I'd like to do Tendou/Kagami, Kirk/Spock (I desperately want Spock to drop the L-bomb and have Jim freak the fuck out at him and Spock point out that 'love' does not just mean 'I want to hammer you into the mattress like it's Pon Farr Week on Vulcan 24 Hour Adult Channel', but ... I dunno, dudes, I dunno), possibly SatDai or Donuts and, I dunno, someone from Gekirangers. Fukamicest or RioMele. Ideas?

Anyway, did caregiving this weekend, which was kind of fun actually. Last night I was sweeping up the dining room and one of the ladies wandered in and ended up helping me sweep up. By that I mean, she swept a tiny corner while I did the rest of the room and was happy as a clam. This particular resident sometimes gets aggressive, but she was in a good mood and there wasn't anybody else there, so I figured the worst that could happen was that she could get upset and whack me with the broom, and I'd have an embarrassing story at the ER. People like to feel useful, yeah? It's not something that goes away.

also it occurred to me this morning as I tried to get my mind off the hamster wheel that I would read the hell out of a fic where Tendou was blind. this actually may make me a terrible person.

finally got past Maylene in god damn Pokeymans. I got a male Houndour and of course named him Masumi because I am, as previously stated, a terrible person. I should not have named my Eevee Juka because apparently Tendou is somewhere in the background, giving the evil eye to every single male Pokemon I put in with her, which is driving me crazy. I just put Masumi in with her. we'll see if she likes him any better than the Pachirisu. come on, bitch, the evil eevee empire depends on YOU.

1. I keep thinking, I could make knitted Pokemons! IT WOULD BE AWESOME. And then I replay what I just said to myself and go find something nice and lethal to drink.

2. On that note, Pokemon designers, explain to me why in hell an Eevee is not cute enough to walk in Amity Park but a Grotile is? I give you Turtwigs, but Grotiles? they are not kawaii, sorry dudes.

3. (Gents, please close your eyes and sing the lalala song.) You would think that with all the earth conscious, frugal, natural living vegan hippie moon-worshiping eco-sensitive chicks on ravelry you could find more than one pattern for knitted sanitary pads there, but noooo I have found one so far and a couple of patterns for Diva Cup holders, one in the shape of a squid. (That one was awesome.) I am unventing one, that you can stick terrycloth into, but I made it to pin on and I think I will have to reunvent to do the snaps instead. There is double-knitting involved.
3a. This is why my mother wakes up in the middle of the night and realizes that she was a single parent for all our formative years and has nobody to blame but herself.

4. Yes, I know you can buy cloth ones, in fact I have a sample one from Party In My Pants Pads, but I am cheap and also have a lot of odd mill ends of Cotton Fleece kicking around. (etsy is apparently the place to shop for them, though. Much cheaper than PIMP or Glad Rags.)

Okay dudes of the audience, you can continue reading now.

Tomorrow at knit night I am actually going to stay longer than five minutes (the last two weeks I've been running in and out d/t either a) being exhausted b) having Mom stop by with grandrats c) both or d) having the death plague) and show one of the chicks how to drop spindle. My evil plan for world domination, let me show it to you.

YES THANK YOU BEBE I ONLY HAD TO RESTART LIKE TEN FREAKING TIMES BEFORE I GOT A GOD DAMN FEMALE EEVEE.

I shouldn't howl too badly. They changed that from Diamond/Pearl so that you actually get a god damn Eevee when you can use it to fill your team with what you're missing. In Diamond/Pearl you had to freaking get your National Dex completed and I didn't have wifi and had about ten left to go before I gave up in disgust. First time I'd ever not beaten the Final Four before I stopped playing a Pokemon game. With Gold/Silver it got to be a training run. "Whups got an Eevee to turn into an Espeon, let's whack an Exp Share on it and run through the Final Four!" (Note: this really really works.)

Well whatever, I just have to breed her to get all the Eevee types. o/ TEAM ARASHI IS ON ITS WAY.


Meg: shit! when do I need to get my money in for .... oh christ, mention loveless and emotry and get added by an emo porn twitter
Dawn: emo porn sounds awesome.
Dawn: I'm too depressed to want to **** you ....
Dawn: I wish you;d want to **** me instead
Meg: apparently it's all skinny twinks in black eyeliner and ugly glasses
Dawn: let's have sad, soulfull eye-sex
Meg: stop it I'm coughing now

it turns out that you DO lose weight lying around for two and a half days living on saltines and hatred! I will be damned. Lost like three pounds, which I am promptly and sincerely attempting to regain by applying copious quantities of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream while bullying Becky into playing Pokeymans (because I am an awesome friend -- oh hey who has friend codes? GIMME). I think next pay period I probably will get the Suikoden game, just to say I tried it. Ingrid informs me that it is full of dudes who are allergic to shirts and also porpoise people.

(Or at least I'd be eating ice cream if it wasn't in the freezer and I was too lazy to get up and get it. Also I keep thinking about cooking rice but ehhh, effort.)

Other than that ... I am three gyms down, five to go in Pokeymans. There is a gay French secret agent running around, and I love him without irony or restraint. I have named my childhood best friend Darwin, as in the Awards. (I swear to God, they were just trying to make sure that nobody slashed him with BoyType. He's a nerd, poor lambkins. Man, does anybody remember Rival from Gold/Silver? Now there was a dude you could get behind shipping with your character. I realize I'm a dork but I had awesome times coming up with things where my character was chillaxing with her Pokeymans and he was being .... himself ... with his, and we had awesome conversations and went and saved the world again. Yeah, you're just lucky I don't write down most of the shit I come up with.) I'm trying to level up my current team enough so we don't get slaughtered in the next gym, but everybody's at the early-mid twenties level where they don't get a lot of points for things near their own level and are too weak to take on things higher up. I have a Ponyta. His name is Tenba. o/

Fortunately I'm taking the DS with me on the bus, so it's easier to level - I like to bust through the story instead of leveling but it's easier for me to just level if I know i won't have enough time to go through the story line.

I'm thinking about knitting and finishing up Garo finally so I can go on to the special, which is allegedly even more slashy than the main series.

But I only caught it lightly, if so! I mean, I am still alive and I can sort of walk again. Yesterday was awesome, only not.

In other news my sister should probably stop looking around for her old meds.

Amy: http://www.pharmacytechs.net/img/thumb/pentobarbital.jpg
Amy: http://www.pharmacytechs.net/img/thumb/nembutal2.jpg
Meg: ....wait so you have a freaked out child and you're putting sedatives up its ass?
Amy: srsly
Meg: How is this NOT like something out of a horrible book?
Amy: I think I'm lucky I got the cherry flavor shit.
Meg: holy shit you do not kid, my friend
Amy: http://www.pharmacytechs.net/img/thumb/painannihilator.jpg
Meg: I've had that migraine
Amy: yyy

THIS IS ACTUALLY A CRY FOR HELP: I have this terrible, terrible urge to make a lot of horrible jokes about John and Rodney from SGA and Kagami and Tendou from Kabuto in the same room. Tendou and Rodney would get into the pissing match from hell. John would see a Worm, scream like a girl and shoot until he ran out of charge. It would be terrible. I kind of want it like burning in my soul.

Traded in some shit at GameStop at Pioneer Square, which was awesome, except they're on the third level of the Artrium area and the nearest elevator was broken and I didn't have a map handy, so Ms Emotional Issues Amounting To Total Phobia With Heights and Open Areas Above The Ground had to ride open escalators up three floors and almost had a breakdown when she got to the third floor. It was fun times if by Fun Times you mean I seriously wanted to die.

I got Pokemon Platinum, though! And then I crawled carefully around the edges of the damn open area and went across the skybridge to the elevator on the other side of the building and went down on that. I walked over to Powell's and got a crepe from the stand by 11th and Alder, which was super tasty. Then it was employee meeting, and then it was Target for shit and the Japanese market for more shit and then I went home. And now I have to do laundry, gnargh.

I'm kind of debating getting Pokemon Platinum - allegedly there is a Game Crazy in Pioneer Place (which i think is in the atrium up a couple floors, urgh) and I have some PS2 games I never play. (I love you, Raidou, but I cannot adequately describe how fucking terrible I am at running around and shooting things.) So I have some that I could trade in, but Diamond frustrated me because I got the Water Starter and I had so many problems trying to get through Victory Road that I eventually just gave up.

But ... Platinum! WiFi! (that was my other problem, no WiFi and a lot of the game depends on having it) I kind of feel like I deserve a new game, but which one should I get? Suggestions?